Abez sez Assalamualaikum!

What the Muslim world needs is more chapatti

There’s a tv channel called QTV- Qur’an tv- upon which there’s a sort of ‘ask the scholar’ type of program. People call in with their problems and a learned man sitting off-camera advises them. Yesterday’s program was rather interesting.

Woman caller: I have a problem with my son, he’s not disobedient, but he sleeps all day and he stays up all night. What should I do?

Moderator: This is a common problem among our youth these days, what do you recommend?

Learned man: When you wake him up for breakfast, make him a chappati and write ‘Ya Allah’ over it with your finger seven times. Then feed it to him.

I’m sure there’s a logical reason for this. The logical explanation must be that chapatti has hyper-religious powers that we don’t. Even though Allah states that He is nearer to us than the jugular veins in our own necks, chapatti can bring Him even closer. That’s how to bring your teenager nearer to God, feed him God.

And if you feel your prayers about your son have been going unanswered, then just address God on a chapatti, because despite the fact that Allah is All-Hearing and All-Knowing and listens to our quietest prayers and hears our secretest thoughts, chapatti is still better at getting His attention than we ever could be.

Such wonders from a home-made flatbread.

I wonder what miracles one could work with a jalebi?

Auzubillah.

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