Nine Months Pregnant

So people sez, “How are you Abez?” And I sez, “Alhamdulillah, nine months pregnant.” Nine months pregnant. Sounds dramatic, doesn’t it- especially with the nine being emphasized to ummm, emphasize that you could go -pop!- at any given moment. Nine Months Pregnant is an explanation unto itself, and if you’ve been there yourself, you nod…

Countdown: Six weeks

I turned around in a store last week and only narrowly avoided knocking into a display shelf. It’s not that I’m miscalculating space, it’s just that my mental idea of how big my stomach is hasn’t quite caught up to the physical reality of how big my stomach is. Six weeks InshaAllah. Six more weeks…

Traditional Hiccups, Traditionally

Traditional hiccups are (traditionally) an involuntary spasm of the diaphragm. The sudden rush of air into the lungs causes the glottis to close, creating the “hic” noise. They are also, traditionally, felt in one’s throat or chest. Fetal hiccups, however, are felt in your big round stomach, and unlike traditional hiccups, cannot be cured by…