And now that the cat’s out of the bag…

Phew! I can finally blog about what’s been on my mind!

Ok, what’s up with the Nuchal Translucency screening? And why did my doctor ask me if I wanted one? I asked her what it was for, and she said that measuring the Nuchal fold in a developing fetus could help determine whether or not your baby has a chromosomal abnormality.

*awkward silence*

And then what?

Well, if it’s positive, you can get further testing done to determine whether your baby has Down’s Syndrome.

And then?

Well, then about 90% of fetuses with Down’s Syndrome are aborted.

You know, they’re working on a prenatal screening for autism. So that potentially, individuals who have autistic traits can be identified before they’re born.

I wonder how high the abortion rate would be, and I think of how amazing, how silly, how sweet, how challenging and fulfilling it is to have Khalid as my son, and how awful it is that parents should choose to kill their children out of… what, fear? Laziness? A murderous need for the neurotypical? An overpowering revulsion to special children? If both of my children were normal then perhaps someone who supported prenatal screening (and subsequent abortion) could tell me to get off my high horse and that I shouldn’t judge a man until I’ve walked a mile in his moccasins, etcetera etcetera. But I don’t have a horse and I know for a fact that Allah does not test anyone more than they can bear. I’ve walked a few miles in special needs moccasins, thank you very much, and I think parents who kill their children out of fear should have their moccasins removed and thrown at them.

And do not kill your children for fear of poverty. We provide for them and for you. Indeed, their killing is ever a great sin.  The Qur’an, Surah Al-Isra, 31

Is fear of poverty the same thing as whatever it is people are fearing when they abort babies with Down’s Syndrome?  I’m not sure what exactly it is they’re afraid of- fear that their child will be made fun of?  So let’s screen for babies with really big ears.  Fear that their child won’t be able to hold a job?  Let’s screen for incompetency too then.  Oh, and blindness!  Don’t forget blindness!  Maybe it’s fear that their child will never lead a ‘normal’ life?  Well, I don’t know if they can develop a prenatal test for turning into an alcoholic or drug addict or someone with bipolar disorder, and I think humanity has yet to apply a standard for what a ‘normal’ life is, but let’s run with this, shall we?

Let’s develop a prenatal test to screen for any and all conditions that cause children to face challenges throughout their lives while causing their parents to sweat blood and bleed tears to provide medical care, education, and adequate opportunities for their children in a world that doesn’t give a hoot.

And then, let’s abort the entire human race.

Because every child is hard work.  Every child costs money.  Every child is in danger of ‘not leading a normal life’ and no child, no matter how thick their Nuchal fold is or how low their amniotic testosterone rate is, comes with a guarantee for an easy upbringing, a bright future, and a normal life.  Being normal isn’t a guarantee of all things bright and beautiful  any more than being ‘abnormal’ means a life-sentence of misery, toil, and complete unhappiness for the entire family + the affected child.

In all of this, I don’t feel sorry for the aborted children as much as I do the parents who chose to abort them.  The children got a one-way ticket to Paradise.  They were made for Jannah.  It’s the parents who have cheated themselves out of the most rewarding journey they could possibly have embarked on, the greatest test of their patience and the greatest blossoming of love they could feel for another human being.  On a side note, they’ll have some questions to answer in the next life.  But in this life even, they have cheated themselves.

You’ll never know how amazing it is to stand on top of the mountain unless you’ve climbed all the way to the top.

I told the doctor no thank you, I have one special needs child and I can have another one.  She nodded at me and smiled.

“Good,” she said.  “I have a special needs child too.  And I would not have it any other way.”

Me neither.  AllahuAkbar.


Abez is a 50% white, 50% Pakistani, and 100% Muslim. She is also chronically ill and terminally awesome. She is the ever-lovin Momma of: - Khalid, a special little boy with autism - Iman, a special little girl with especially big hair -Musfira, an especially devious baby Spoiler, Abez is also Zeba Khan on

  1. Stranded

    Muslims are prolife and we make no excuses about it.

    But it is very very sad to hear parents of special needs kid talk about how it would be good to have prenatal autism screening and they would have thought twice about “having” the baby. I dont get it, you are already pregnant and having the baby? It would be another thing if parents could get tested BEFORE conceiving and be like yeah YOU for sure are gonna produce some crazy broken children and should therefore be aborted from the human race, I wonder how that would make adults feel? But yeah its ok to kill the babies.

  2. Abez

    Stranded- I know, right? You’re already pregnant at this point, and the test is offered just as you’re finishing the first trimester, and you were otherwise going to keep the baby (otherwise you would have have at least eight weeks prior to decided not to) and I don’t even know why people are being offered this test, as if they have a right to decide whether their children live or die. So instead of a ‘life-sentence’ of disability, they opt for the death sentence. Lovely.


  3. Carol

    Faith in God requires us to make tough choices about how we manifest that faith. May God continue to bless you and your family and reward your faith. I read reciently that showing faith in God allows God to show His faith in us. He knows our limits, needs and how to make us grow.

  4. Mona

    Yeah, I don’t get the point of these tests either. I refused all the ones they asked me to do. Wonderful read, as always!

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