Ilm Fest 2014, here I come!
Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, HF has agreed to wrangle the kids on his own and let me zoom off to Ilm Fest! I’m going to Malaaaaaaysiaaaaaa! And also? I’m too busy to write properly. Away!
Islam, Autism, Mom-ism.
Alhamdulillah, Alhamdulillah, HF has agreed to wrangle the kids on his own and let me zoom off to Ilm Fest! I’m going to Malaaaaaaysiaaaaaa! And also? I’m too busy to write properly. Away!
“Do you still have that ‘fear/depression’ after the shattering? I do.. still. The shattering did make me gain more trust .. But .. the fear of those trials or the depression still remains in a corner. I am still dangling between Hope and Fear (from the trials, Astaghfirullah).” -Tired of Trying
I’m trying to concentrate on prayer, and the following conversation transpires before me:
Musfira: Iman, canna have a cotton candy?
Iman: Musfira, these are cotton balls, not cotton candy.
Musfira; Notta candy?
Iman: No, it’s not candy. Do you know what this is made of?
Our lil family has a favorite game, and the way it’s won is by preserving momma’s sanity with three children and no volume control. We stick to animals to keep it simple, and a turn always starts with the phrase “I’m thinking of an animal,”…
I think I may not have updated for over a month. High score! So here’s the world’s shortest summary of last month: Iman: Grommets in, tonsils & adenoids out. Two weeks off school, ice-cream and lollipops FTW! We spent a day and a half in…
Forget the naked lollipop schtick and the oversimplification of covered = protected and protected = virtuous.
Hijab is about setting the market value for yourself in an economy driven by sex and how much it’s currently going for.
I am busy curating powerful germs. Because everyone needs a hobby. By Abez, The End.
Alhamdulillah, our office has finally been moved into the premises of the larger organisation that we are joining. It’s a real office. With real people. And when you’re me, every day is Take Your Toddler to Work Day! I think Musfira likes it so far.…
These days, there are four magic words from Musfira’s mouth that cause me to go into instant state of anxiousness.
“Mama, I hep yoo!”
It is the way of man that if
Sin should maul his hand
He at once withdraws and cradles it
And marvels at the pain…
I invited myself over to a friend’s house yesterday. Normally I invite people over to my house instead, but since we’ve been without a housekeeper for the past three weeks, I don’t think any of my friends would appreciate an afternoon in the sty with…
Ingredients:
200 grams of Hersheys unsweetened cocoa powder
1 cup (that’s it, one plastic cup)
1 flat, dry work surface. Preferably a coffee table.
20 minutes of suspicious silence…
The mechanism of autism is unknown, and that’s ok. Research takes time, especially when you’re talking about complex neurological disorders. We- the people who have to manage autism behaviorally before it can either be prevented or effectively treated- find meaning in our role in making…
Musfira comes skipping excitedly into my room:
Musfira: Momma! Iss somefing!
Momma: Yes dear?
Musfira: Somefing inna body went pffft!
(Musfirs grabs her bottom with both hands and grins)
Frazzled. That’s a great word. I like it. I will now use it. I don’t have a housekeeper again. My sister is leaving for Singapore for neurosurgery and three weeks in hospital in two days. Work is work. Enough said. My mother is moving apartments.…
Musfira asks Momma for a cookie.
Momma gives Musfira a cookie.
Musfira receives the cookie and folds it carefully into a tissue and…
So HF made me write a list of affirmations. Cheesy, I know- but surprisingly effective. Everyone needs an anchor sometimes, and right now, mine is affirmation number one: I am an overachiever. I won’t bore you with the rest of the affirmations, but that’s the…
GOT THE BIGGEST ICE CREAM LOVE IMAN Note from Momma: Iman typed this blog by herself, and I had no intention of making any changes, but when autocorrect underlined her spelling of “bigist,” she had to ask why the computer was putting red lines under…
I woke up this morning, and I noticed that Musfira was already awake and singing in her crib. I wanted to use the bathroom before picking her up and activating Mommy Mode for the day, so I stood up quickly when she was looking the other way, starting tiptoeing and then-
Last week or so- HF decided that we were going to stay up super late (or some of us, nap super late) and then go out and watch the Geminid meteor shower with the Dubai Astronomy Club. I thought it was a lovely idea. The…
Will ye laugh and yet not weep for the years you’ve lived asleep?
Asleep to numb your fears,
And numb to soothe your cares?
So I went into the bathroom yesterday. I picked up a kids toothbrush and I squirted some pink, raspberry flavored, fluoride-free toothpaste on it. Then, I opened my own mouth, popped it in, and got halfway through brushing and humming the toothbrush song before I…
I shoulda seen it coming. I felt Musfira make a tiny little gagging sound as I held her over my shoulder. After all, I have three children. I know how ominous one tiny *herp?* from a child’s mouth can be. Sometimes that’s the only warning…
Well, we now officially have a GoFundMe page. JazakAllahuKheiran to Mariam for setting it up. 🙂 I feel nervous and excited. But nervous. But hey, what have I got to lose? Apart from the not for profit autism intervention service that I’ve invested the last…
AssalamuAlaikum all of you really awesome peoples. 🙂 Through the grace and mercy of Allah, which facilitates the kindness and generosity of people like you, things are looking better for AutismUAE. Not only have the comments in my last post reached almost a third of…
To make a long story short, the not-for profit autism intervention service that I founded three years ago is in danger of going under. Partly due to a long string of non-paying parents, and partly due to a chronically ill, depressed, and mentally spazztastic director.…
Everyone has a purpose in this life. Sometimes I think mine may be to give medical staff something funny to talk about over break, MashaAllah. My doctors are trying to figure out if my POTS, progressive weakness & neuropathy are caused by an underlying auto-immune…
This is an elaborate status update that you didn’t ask for. But it’s not complaining. I’ve been cat-sitting for my sister’s cats for a week or so now, and they follow me from room to room mewling expectantly. Whenever I sit down to work…
One of the ways that Shaitaan tries to bring me down is to get me to use the internet for wandering into distraction versus addressing any cause of my stress, or Shaitaan-Forbid- actually making dua or something. So I use his own trick against him…
Darkness lies around him
and watches with dark eyes
whispering suggestions
suggesting lovely lies…
I have a special relationship with the Philippines- even though I doubt the islands know. When my son was diagnosed with autism and my husband and I were struggling to meet his monthly therapy needs and begging Allah for help, He gave us a special…
“Asalaamualaikum please don’t think dat i am belittling your problems but i want to kill myself but i cant as it is prohibited i feel i am accumulating sins day by day isn’t it better for me to die i am not satisfied with my…
Once upon a time, my sister Owl used to blog, so if I needed to share an update about her, I could just link her post. However, it’s been a while since she has, and I think her blog may no longer be public access,…
There is a nagging, gnawing on the inside of my soul, it’s the feeling of my body giving up before its time…
Aaaaaand now that I’m out I can’t go back in again, and overwhelmingly I am getting asked one question from the people who know me in real life: How come I didn’t know you were sick?! Well, it’s not really a talking point for most…
There aren’t enough characters in the title limit to fully express how many Alhamdulillahs I would like to put in the title, so I have to settle for one. So, Alhamdulillah, my neurologist in Chicago (who I visit this last week) has helped me clarify…
Autism has its pros and cons- and boy does it ever have its cons- but SubhanAllah, it really has its pros. Khalid doesn’t just like dinosaurs, he likes reading about them, and he doesn’t just read stories, he reads encyclopedias. And he’s not just reading…
It was a strange angle for my head to be tilted at, cocked severely to the right and resting uneasily against the cabin window. I woke up because I smelled eggs. The passenger to my left was still asleep. She was a designer for a major retailer. She said you could put Hello Kitty on a pink garbage bag and it would sell. She’s right.
I am small, my wings are broken.
My words shake like my hands.
But I will lift my voice to the One who understands.
Iman: Momma, your hands are shaking! Me: Yes, they do that sometimes dear. Iman: I’ll stop it for you! :holds my hand: That’s my girl.