The Mother of All Mommaisms

So I went into the bathroom yesterday.  I picked up a kids toothbrush and I squirted some pink, raspberry flavored, fluoride-free toothpaste on it.  Then, I opened my own mouth, popped it in, and got halfway through brushing and humming the toothbrush song before I realized I was on autopilot.

I laughed so hard my face hurt.

It’s been an awesome and funny week.  Awesome, and amazing, and exciting because the AutismUAE GoFundMe campaign has made the 10K we needed for license renewal, and people still keep tipping coins into the hat.  Funny because my children have been more amusing than usual.

Khalid declared that Musfira could play with his trains only after she learned how to speak English.

I taught the children how to play I-Spy in the car.

Khalid: I spy, with my little eye, something that is that orange car.

-blink blink-

Iman: I spy, with my little eye, something that is yellow!

Musfira: SUN!

(it’s 8 pm)

Iman in patronizing big sister voice: No Musifra, it’s not the sun. Can you see the sun? It’s not in the sky right now.

Khalid: Its light is reflecting off the moon. The sun is in the sky.

Iman: Wha?

Khalid: It’s day time in the Western pole.

Khalid is recently into directions, and so last week when we heard a neighbor’s dog barking, Iman said, “Oh, I hear a dog!” And Khalid said, “Yes, it’s north-west.”


And Musfira, upon opening her eyes after nap-time and seeing Aunt Owlie for the first time after her two weeks in the US said,

Aunty, your cat food is spicy.

It’s also been a bit of a rough week, with all three kids sick with something or the other- Musfira’s nose threw up. Khalid’s had a three-day stomach ache.  I took Iman and her ears to see an ENT and he very politely informed us that both of her ears were full of fluid and that they both had negative pressure.  I don’t know enough about ears to know what negative pressure is, but by golly, I will google it.

So Iman has to take “‘skusting medicine” for the next ten days to see if the fluid can be cleared up.  If not, then we X-ray to see what kind of mechanical problem there could be.  I’ve told Iman not to worry, because it’s a win-win.  If Iman takes all of her medicine for all ten days, she is going to get the BIGGEST ICE CREAM SUNDAE IN THE WORLD.

Three whole scoops to be precise.

Then, if she has taken all of her medicine but the fluid hasn’t cleared, then she and I will have a special sleepover in the hospital and she will get to pick out a much-coveted, often longed-for, overpriced mylar balloon from the hospital gift shop.  Either way, we both get ice-cream, and one of us gets a balloon. Alhamdulillah.

So now it’s time for bed, my day started at six am and involved a two hour meeting, two good friends, and both HF’s and my parents unexpectedly showing up for dinner at the same time, without prior planning.  Alhamdulillah, its finally time for bed. Alhamdulillah. 🙂




Abez is a 50% white, 50% Pakistani, and 100% Muslim. She is also chronically ill and terminally awesome. She is the ever-lovin Momma of: - Khalid, a special little boy with autism - Iman, a special little girl with especially big hair -Musfira, an especially devious baby Spoiler, Abez is also Zeba Khan on

  1. Khaaaaan!

    First off, Muabaraks! And *hugs*

    Musfira tried Owl’s cat food?! NO. Hahahahahaha! Aw.. ugh. I remember I had a secret craving for Pusha’s food (Saima phupho’s cat, I hope you remember him) as it looked like little ginger breadbones. But one time, Saima phupho or Faheem Chacha I think, opened the packet and filled Pusha’s bowl in front of me. IT SMELT OF FISH. I felt heartbroken yet pleased that I didn’t try it. 😛

    I shall ask Khalid to teach me directions whenever we meet. My knowledge of directions is directionless! Like my life. Sigh.

    I think, Imaan has Acute Otitis Media (the inflammation of the mucosa lining the middle ear and fluid presence in it) followed by Serous Otitis media. Very common in kids. You see, ear is divided into external ear, middle ear and inner ear. Middle ear starts from eardrum till cochlea (portion of one of the bones in ear). There’s a narrow tube that connects middle ear with the back of nose – the Eustachian tube. This Etube serves as pressure equalizer and drainage of mucus for middle ear by opening up while swallowing and yawning. Etube is sloping in adults but in kids and infants it’s horizontal and narrow-er. Horizontal anatomy makes kids prone to easy propagation of bacteria as well as if bottle-fed, risk of milk entering into the middle ear – hence, always head to be a little elevated while bottle-feeding. Other than this, nasal allergies and enlarged adenoids (type of tonsils) may play a role in blocking the Etube. Eustachian tube blockage leads to fluid retention and negative pressure. The isolation of the middle ear cavity from the outside environment by Etube blockage, the air is taken up by the mucosa lining the middle ear which pulls the eardrums inward. Which leads to fluid retention over a period of time. If that fluid undergoes bacterial contamination it turns into acute otitis media. I have ENT this year. Sorry, If I bored you! 😉 😀

  2. Abez

    Sadiyya- Ameen- It amazes me too, and I try to write things down so that I don’t forget because I like to compare his development as it progresses 🙂

    Khaaaaaan: You’re silly, and thankfully, I never tried cat food either. Because apparently, it’s spicy :p

    I appreciate the ENT lesson, since for all my medical misadventures I know very little about the ear. Iman has been exemplary at taking her skusting medicine, and I’m genuinely excited about watching her plow through a three scoop sundae in a few days 🙂

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